Happy Birthday to my first born...

Twenty Five years ago I became a mother. Twenty Five years ago a blonde hair blue eyed boy rocked my world. There are days when I think back and really miss my little man and all the mischief  he, his brother and his childhood friends use to get into...and they still do every now and then!Yes boys...even things like catching the field on fire! Or climbing on top of the garage roof...telling me you could see the whole world! You were only 5 then and my heart didn't find it to funny! I remember watching you as a young boy sharing your faith ...just think of all those seeds that you have planted! So many memories...it all passed too quickly!

 Justin has grown up to be a man trying to live a life of faith. This rec department counselor... soon to be Archaeologist...we hope...makes this mom's heart jump with pride when I see his love for the Lord. We're still praying for a great job offer...anyone need an Archaeologist? An Internship would work! This graduating class has had a tough time finding jobs. It can be very discouraging to invest years and all that money into a degree... graduating with no job possibilities. I keep telling him God has him at the rec department for a reason. He is very good with kids and they love him! He has been working with kids since the age of 2 17...he's ready for a change.   However..the rec department doesn't pay the bills! All in God's timing!

Justin...Happy Birthday! I so wished I hadn't blinked so quickly! Here you are...25 and I'm getting old!  Although you may not have the job you would like...God has a plan!  He is molding you into a man after His own heart. He's taking you down a road of faith that will only make you stronger. A road that will  lead you to the prize of eternal life! As I watch you with all those kids that you lead...I see a man who will make a great dad someday! I know you get discouraged about this lack of work...but keep the Faith...God's not finished!

Childhood friends...(aka..pyromaniacs)

I love his smile!

I love you Justin...you are a blessing!

7 daughters…What was God thinking?!

A daughter…something most women long to have. Me…I have seven! Seven sisters range in age from 22 to 3 ½. The oldest just married this past May. The youngest is just trying to figure out where she fits in the mix. Usually right in the middle of it all! God has such a good sense of humor!

Where do I start…

There’s clothes, makeup, boys, hair, and the ever dreaded hormones x 7! Make that 8...my own! Me…I wear the hats of many professions. I often look in the mirror to see which hat I have on at the moment . I would hate to be in comedian mode when our girls are upset and need a counselor. Our poor boys…my poor husband! They just shake their heads and run when all the hormones start flying. We are blessed to have three great men in our lives. They have learned to live with all eight of us and rarely complain…that is an accomplishment! Our sons will make great husbands one day. I just pray for the women that they bring into the mix…that’s a lot of sisters to win over in order to marry the man of their dreams!

I grew up in a house with two younger sisters. I thought I knew a thing or two about raising girls. After all…I was one! I have come to realize in today’s society… raising our children the way we were raised is near impossible! Teaching our daughters to become wives and mothers has become a lost art. A very difficult thing to teach during the teen years.

One thing that helps me a lot is looking at the teen years as an illness…and it is! Just think…they have so many changes going on inside. They don’t even know how to understand…much less control the craziness. Sometimes they just need a listening ear…but not all of them at the same time! Those times are when I want to run for the hills…or pull the covers over my head!

Our children have so many more things to contend with these days.
There’s the media…music, movies and TV. There’s electronics…my grandmother would be amazed at these gadgets called cell phones! You know?…those things that never leave our kids hands! So many things pulling and fighting for our kids attention. How I long for the simpler of days!
　
I know each generation has it’s own problems. But this one has me really worried. Our kids are getting lost in the shuffle...even in our churches! Many teens leave the church right out of high school and never return to their faith. Today’s churches are so busy entertaining the kids and not teaching or connecting with them. When it’s time to be an adult and leave the nest so to speak…they feel lost and disconnected. Why stay and fellowship with the adults when the adults have never taken the time to get to know these young people or even listen to what they have to say? These kids are our future church. Just think what the church will look like in 10 years if all our kids are walking away from the faith.

I recently sat with a couple of teens fresh out of high school. Again at an age where they are too old for youth group and feeling too young for our college and career group. Stuck in the middle… middle child syndrome. It was sad to hear their comments. They were lost in where to fit in. They want to be used…not put in a box! Kids are going to go where they feel needed and wanted. Teaching them to step up and communicate their desires is so difficult. Sometimes we are so busy taking care of others outside our homes…that we are failing to see the needs of those under our very own roofs. We as adults will get out exactly what we invest in our kids. That stays true to anything or other relationships in our lives. My mom use to tell me…“In order to have friends you first have to be a friend.” That concept can be used in investing of yourself in any relationship. I will say…It’s not my job to be my kid’s “friend”…they need me to be a parent! When a parent tries to step into the friend mode they lose the very special connection they have with their kids.

Parents are so busy trying to make ends meet…they are failing to really listen to the hearts of their kids. Kids are raising themselves and each other. When is the last time you sat down with a young person and just listened? When is the last time you had more than a five minute conversation with your teenager? I am so guilty of not paying attention to our youth…helping them to see their value in our homes and churches. We all want to feel valued. Sometimes you just have to step out of that box( comfort zone) and ask God to place you where He wants you…which is the very best place to be.

Our kids are the next generation of leaders…scary ? To think of them in those terms…we better wake up! Our daughters are the next generation’s mothers…and our sons fathers or leaders of this world. Parenting is tough…but that’s not an excuse!

One of those teens I had a conversation with…my very own daughter. Yes…even I miss the mark in connecting with my kids. Do I have all the right answers…NO! But I know someone who does! Although it is ultimately their choice to follow Jesus…I pray I never have to see them fall from His grace.

Connecting with our youth starts with time and a good listening ear. It’s time to slow down…It’s time to listen! We have to get off the sidelines and get into the game! It’s time to let our kids know they matter in this world…that they have a purpose! One day they may be the ones taking care of us!

I challenge you to get to know the youth in your communities and churches. Yes…they may seem weird in dress and actions. But actually they are very smart and kind of neat. They might even teach you a thing or two. Just remember what you see on the outside that might annoy you….there is something so much different on the inside that would amaze you! It’s all about relationship! If you want to help our youth of today…start by giving them your time and ear!

I recently found an article ...Why students abandon their faith  Lessons from William Wilberforce

What if.....

What if I had only… What if I had not…What if he…What if she…What if ! What if ! What if !!!

Do you ever catch yourself thinking this? These thoughts and feelings come in a moment of fatigue and frustration. A time when you would like to be someone else in a different time and place. A time when you would like to go back and start over! Hind sight is always twenty-twenty!

This past week in our community a young man lost his life crossing a busy street in front of the skate park. Very sad...but I believe God ordained ...the vehicle who hit him was driven by a youth pastor and kids on their way to a lock in. Do you think that young man knew that Friday was his last day here on this Earth? I wonder how many witnesses to the accident had the thought..."What if"? Would the young man have lived his life differently had he known? Would you....if you knew it was your last day? It's strange how a death can really make you think of your very own mortality. Sometimes making you think about your relationship with Jesus Christ or the lack there of. We don't get a second chance once we're gone. Life can end in an instant...leaving those that we love saying "what if !"

What if my dad hadn’t died…who would I be today? What if he had made a different choice to not leave that day? We all make choices that change the course of history. Some simple and some very important choices. Even the simplest of choices change how our day or life plays out.Our choices not only affect us…but often those that we love.

I am continually encouraging my children to make wise choices in their lives. Sometimes they listen…sometimes they don’t! I know there have been times when I have heard them say…“If only I had listened!” Those words are music to a mother’s ears! Finally…they get it! They did hear me! Now to get them to think this way ALL the time. What if?

So often I do the same thing with my Lord. He speaks…I ignore. He speaks again…I run. He speaks so quietly…calling me to sit with Him and listen. What if I obeyed his calling? How different my life would be.Am I too busy? Am I afraid to obey His request? I know He has my best interest at heart. He knows my future. But yet I shut out that still small voice and in my own selfishness do my thing…in my own power. Then in the end…I say…What if ? “I wish I had only listened!” Those are the words that our Heavenly Father longs to hear.

Choosing to follow Christ is something I have to do daily. My decision to surrender my life to Him was the best choice I have ever made! What if I hadn’t made that choice? Who knows ? I hope I never have to find out! My heart changed the day I gave my life to my savior. All my wants, needs and desires changed too! This is the one “What if” that I will never look back on and regret!

My father in law once told his children…“Live your life with no regrets!”Your actions are something you can never take back! Slow down… Think before you say and do! We have all heard it but yet those choices are made and the regrets are left in their wake.
Isn’t it time to put the past in the past and look to the future? Yes…you have regrets of the bad choices you have made. No one can change their past! But…it’s never to late to look straight ahead and make a change for the future! Learn from it and move on!
“What if you did!”  Life is too short!

Anniversary week...26 years and counting!

This past week my husband and I went away to spend some alone time at our little piece of heaven. Three summers ago we began building our home away from home. This week was actually the very first time we have spent any time alone there....and it was so peaceful! I do enjoy spending time with our children at the lake. But this week was a refreshment to my soul!

This past year has been non-stop on the go events. In fact I can't even remember the last time I went away with my hubby. Something that is very necessary...especially living in a home with 9 kids.  Much like other needs...We often put our marriage on the back burner when in fact it should be front and center. Just like anything else....You will get back what you invest....that includes any relationship you may have.

Finding time to get away can be a difficult task. Time, money,help with the kiddos...a major obstacle in itself. Thanks mom!

We had a great time away. I believe I would have been content to just sit on the porch and enjoy the beautiful weather...along with the peace and quiet. We spent our anniversary seeing an early movie and dinner at a new Chinese restaurant we discovered last time we were at the lake. Day two we drove to a town 2 hours away to do a little family history research. My husbands family has Lucy Holcombe Pickens...Queen of the confederacy...in their lineage. We found the cemetery where she was buried and spoke with the town historians. As my hubby spent time looking at the family archives...I had some time to shop and enjoy just wondering around this small country town... Edgefield S.C....  http://www.edgefieldsc.net/  Friday we relaxed on the porch until our evening night out at the Abbeville Opera House. Abbeville Opera House We have wanted to see a play there ever since we discovered this sweet little town. I think we were the youngest kids there! But we really enjoyed it!

All in all we had a great time and we received our second wind so that we could come home to our sweet little family...whom we missed very much! Who needs a very expensive vacation when you can have peace and quiet on a screen porch down by a little lake in Iva,S.C.?  And the alone time with the man I have had the privilege of growing old with for 26 years....Priceless!

An answer to prayer...and almost hugging the insurance adjuster!

Our house is at the age where everything...I mean EVERYTHING... seems to be in need of replacement or repair. With a large family some of those things just have to get put on the back burner...bottom of the honey to do list! Because of so many people in our home... some things just have to be replaced more often...unlike the home's of a smaller family!


Georgia is known to have some pretty good wind and rain storms with an occasional tornado and hail to go along with it. It was after one of those storms that we lost a lot few of our shingles.Not thinking this could be an insurance claim... we just assumed it was the age of the roof and it needed to be replaced.That was until I started noticing many homes in our area reroofing their homes...some were only a few years old!

Reluctantly I called a few roofers for estimates. They did tell me our roof was in bad shape...like I didn't already know that! But they gave me some good advice and I made the anxious call to my Wonderful Insurance agent. A week later an adjuster showed up at our home and did the initial inspection...inside and out. All they wanted to do was pay for all inside damages...water spots...and one slope of the house roof and one slope of the garage roof. As instructed I requested a second inspection and a meeting with my Wonderful roofer. Another week and another inspection....Thank you God...approval for the whole roof to be replaced. I was so excited I almost hugged the insurance adjuster!

Today our new roof is gracing our home! I can't tell you the load that has been lifted from my shoulders...a load I should not have carried in the first place. You see..I have a trust problem. I do this all the time! I lay my burdens at God's feet...but then I pick them up again! What's up with that? Why can't I realize He has my best interest close to His Heart? As I asked Him for the funds to replace the roof months ago....He heard me!
Sometimes I feel so helpless when things are beyond my control. You know? That's where God wants me...out of the control seat! His will...His timing. Had He not allowed for the funds to reroof...I would still praise Him and I would continue to make my request known...I would wait! His will ...His timing!

We all love to see answers to our prayers. Sometimes God answers them in ways we never thought of. Sometimes the answers come instantly...sometimes days,months or even years later! And when He answers in a way that we don't like...trust is the only answer. Trust that He knows us best...He knows our future!

Philippians 4:6 (New International Version)

6Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Keep the faith...NEVER give up hope!

Praying for Olivia...Day 54

I know I haven't updated in a while. So here is an update from Olivia's mom below. After the transplant Olivia has had many ups and downs...additional surgeries(a stent)...tons of prayers...and  a faith that continues to hold on the the hem of the Father. Please continue to hold this sweet family in your prayers.



Hi guys


I know it has been a few days since I have updated. I have just been tired. I think that the light of maybe going home has made my body want to go home. Anyway, every day I send a few more things home in hopes that we will all be home soon.

Unfortunately Olivia's body has to cooperate with us too. Her bilirubin went up yesterday and she did not have a great day in feeling well but, I can tell she is stronger because she was fighting it all day. She played Scrabble with the Respiratory Therapist, Tennis with the Phyisical Therapist, Scattergories with the Volunteer, made bead lanyards for the nurses and overall just entertained all day. She was her old self in a way where she was fighting the sickness so she could do what she wanted not what her body wanted her to do. She was wiped out at bedtime and so was I. She had a fairly restful night.

Her stent is leaking a bit, her numbers are changing a bit but they are still talking going home. Dean is a little unsure about us going home but me, I am so ready that I will be nmore than happy to rush back here if I can just have a night or two in my own bed. I'm just saying :)

Good news on the prayer front for some. It seems baby Claire (she has the heart problem and surgery and is an infant) has come through things beautifully and her heart is actually doing well now. They still need her to eat and that is a problem...but her heart is good! Hooray! Like I tell other people, we are finally past the life and death stuff,...so it's still the dangerous stuff but you can deal with that. Life and death, not so much.

Other babies in need of prayer is little Chloe along with Sawyer and I think I remember the name correctly Gheri.....but God knows.

Have a most blessed day. We are starting the count down here. We are on day 54 since this admission which is actully shorter than her first transplant, woohoo...we were 3 months on that one...and we are headed for some recovery. We may not be moving "up" as the Doctors say, but we for sure are not moving back. Yeah. Go God. Go "Friends of Olivia" that have been forever faithful. You will never know the blessing you have been to us, the witness you have been to us and others and the encouragement that our family needed you were quick to provide.
Love you all Blessings

In His Grip, Forever

Barb

Our Journey to 26 years...my journey to prince charming!

What you see above is 26 years of  Love, Laughter and Faith.

As a young girl I always dreamed of the day I would meet my prince charming. I remember hearing my mom encourage her daughters to pray for their future spouses...we were only 6, 10 and 13. But how important those prayers of her young daughters would be. Little did I know just five years later I would meet my prince charming. My journey to meet him was filled with five years of  wondering who he might be. Always asking God...Is this the one?  Sometimes not asking or listening...taking the chance of missing out on my blessing.

At the age of 17 my family left the church I had known, a youth group that included my only friends and a relationship with someone who I thought was that prince charming. Not realising it...but God was moving me towards my prince charming...the one He chose for me! As painful as the journey was... I had to learn to trust God in what I thought was a terrible choice my parents had made. We began attending Calvary Chapel Atlanta... forty- five minutes away from home. OK God...How can I have friends if they are so far away? I loved my youth group at my other church! As we adjusted to our new church...it took me a while...but my heart began to change.

I remember when I first saw my prince charming. We had stayed after church for a time of fellowship and volleyball. As I watched this game...feeling like a foreigner in a place with strange people...there was this one guy who caught my eye. I remember thinking...he's so friendly and loves making others laugh. Very different from little ole me...shy and very reserved. Besides he's way older than me! Where are the young people my age? I want my friends back! I want my old youth group! I hate change!

My family continued to attend this new fellowship with great teaching and strange people. For those who have ever attended a Calvary Chapel you will know what I'm talking about. I went from wearing dresses and heels to jeans and flip flops. A casual atmosphere filled with people who loved God's word.  Many of those we fellowshipped with had weekly bible studies in their homes....no mid week service. My sister asked me to go with her to this one on Thursday nights near our home...and that bible study continues even today. I reluctantly went...I'm still getting use to this new church. Very non traditional from what I had been a part of. So... dragging my feet I went. Guess who was leading this bible study? You guessed it...that volley ball playing funny guy...my prince charming! I'm still not seeing God's hand in all this...I so see it now!

Before long this volleyball playing...bible study teaching guy was gracing our doorstep with his presence. I bet you thought it was to see me? No...to start another bible study for college age kids and to build an addition onto our house. Yes...God is so good! He works all things out for our good!

During all this...I'm still in High School.  My senior year I'm trying to finish up school and God is at work trying to bring together two people. I remember thinking as I  prayed one day...God please bring some excitement into my life! I have know idea what your plans are for my life...but you know the desires of my heart! Be careful what you pray for!

The next few months were a blur. I had school to finish...a June mission trip to Scotland came into the picture January 1984...and February 1984 God began to speak to my heart. I knew God was doing something. I remember mentioning it to my mom...not knowing prince charming was having his heart tugged at the same time. I had given up on dating and decided to wait on the Lord to bring him to me. Over the past few months we...I ...had gotten to know this volleyball playing...bible study teaching and now builder. He was now at our house many days during the week building our addition. God your so sneaky! One Sunday morning during worship I noticed prince charming  leave. Thinking something was wrong...my heart hurt for him. Later I would find out he was so overjoyed in the Lord that he had to leave to spend some quiet time with the Lord. That is where God would speak so very loudly to him. That same afternoon I had a meeting at church and wouldn't be home until late. I came home to find ...Mr. Prince Charming at my house. What I thought was him spending time talking to my dad about nothing much...was a life changing event about to happen.

Without anyone realising it God had been speaking to our hearts all at the same time. The conversation with my dad was about me! I think it caught us all by surprise...but all in God's plan. You see... in the world's eyes he was too old for me...nine years older. In the world's eye's I was way too young to be getting married...only eighteen. But God never goes by the world's standards!

One evening while sitting in our living room my prince charming came to call. I lived in a house with two parents and five kids. Never would or could you have a room to yourself! That evening everyone left the room...I had no clue what was about to happen! As I set there reading the news paper my nerves began to shiver...those butterflies began to flutter...my God began to put together a friendship that has grown  for almost 26 years now. There we set all alone in the living room in my parents home. I know he was nervous. This is a man who loves a crowd...but put him one on one and he becomes the quiet shy one. Me... I love one on one...a crowd scares me to death! Opposites attract...we couldn't be more opposite if we tried. But we have grown closer and now at times finish each others sentences. It took him a while but he mustered up the courage to ask me out. I knew...I knew God was in this. All I could say was... You'll have to ask my dad first. And he grinned...Earlier that week...that Sunday the permission had already been given!

The next few months were a whirl wind of events. I worked really hard to finish school and prepare to leave the country for a two month mission trip.  May...right before I graduated... we made our engagement official! Talking about praying for some excitement ! I graduated and we planned  for a September wedding...and I left the country. Leaving all the planning to my family. I returned early August...to my prince charming and a wedding to finish planning. On a beautiful day in September...on my grandparents 60th wedding anniversary...I married that volleyball player,bible study teacher,builder,friend and blessing from the Lord...my prince charming!

 I have now experienced this with my daughter too. Sometimes we get our eye's off of God's plan for our lives. We run and fight against all that we know we should be doing. We make choices that aren't in agreement with God's will for our lives. Our choices do and will effect those that we love. Had I not listened to what God was saying to me...I would have missed out on a huge blessing in my life...my prince charming and our nine children.

I love you Kelley Holcombe! This journey we are on continues to amaze me. I have been praying for you since the age of thirteen. We love because our God continues to be the heart of our friendship and marriage. Thank you for obeying the Lord even when the world said you should not. Growing old with you is what makes my heart smile as I think of the heritage that we will leave. I am so proud to be your wife and mother to our nine children.  As our journey continues...my heart will only grow fonder of the man who makes me happy and continues to encourage me to trust the one who brought us together. As you lead our family...I pray God gives you wisdom and strength to leave a Godly heritage to our children and grandchildren...great grandchildren....Wow! we are going to have a long lasting lineage!

I pray that God gives me the privilege to hold your hand for many many more years!