My Daddy....just memories of a time that is gone

I have been thinking about this post for a while. My sister's post inspired me to put it into words. I guess dinner and that coffee on the screen porch will have to wait. We need a pilot and a plane in the family!

Fading memories are all I have left of the man whom I called dad for a very short 13 years. The sound of his voice is barely a whisper now. For my sisters even less. I sometimes wonder how different our lives would be right now if the choices he made had been different. But then again...we wouldn't be the women we are today if our past journey hadn't happened.

This post if for my sisters and my children.

This is the man I remember:
A Tucker High School graduate who held many records in track,football and baseball
Married his high school sweet~heart...I think she's the most wonderful lady that there ever was!
They had 3 beautiful daughters..He he!!!
Loved horses
Loved hunting...quail,deer,pigs.
His dad's pride and joy...only son
He loved his mama....We did too!
Welder by trade
Loved to have fun
Loved motorcycles and took many long trips with my mom to Gatlinburg. He even took us on many rides.
I think two of the funniest things I remember was watching him ride our go-cart around the neighbors dirt bike track late one evening...he had drank a few beers before that. I often share this next story with my kids and our youngest has found this to be her most favorite hiding spot. One evening we were playing hide-n-seek. My dad, who was maybe 5'11, hid while it was my turn to find him. I will never forget seeing him perched on top of our refrigerator with a big ole grin on his face! A smile I often see on my own two son's faces.
Played the guitar..mostly country and bluegrass
He liked Hank Williams Jr's music
He smoked
Loved Pepsi... The highlight of our day was to get him a glass of cold Pepsi when he got home. And served it to him as he sat in his recliner. Often fighting over who would get to serve him.
Loved popcorn...and popcorn seeds
Gardened a lot with his dad(Grandaddy Melton) Not sure how much of this he enjoyed. But he was a devoted son. They did make a beautiful garden!
Let us work in the garden with him....well maybe a strong request. We hated picking green beans that were climbing on the corn stalks!
He loved boiled peanuts!
I remember hunting snapping turtles with him and grandaddy for turtle stew...it really wasn't that bad!
Those dirty work boots at the door...we all liked to step inside them. Especially Kathy!
Levis jeans were his pants of choice
Always had a hat on....to hide the hair he lost.
He used hair spray for ...yes he had a comb over! That explains the hat!
Kelly always liked to do anything he did. You could always find her by his side. I think she would have gone hunting with him had he let her.
He loved baseball and was still playing on a company team up until the day he died.
The day of his funeral I remember looking back as we drove down 78. All I could see were cars for miles and miles with their headlights on. Thinking... all these people loved my daddy!


I wish I could say so much more about him and the things he did that had eternal value. I wish I could say what a Godly man he was and what a strong leader he had been in our home. But I can't. The man I knew at 13, I loved. I thought he hung the moon. He worked hard to provide for our family so our mom could stay at home. For that I am very thankful! But I'm sad to know all that he has missed because of the choices he made. And didn't make.
Drinking,driving and no seat belt played a role in his death that last day. A choice that changed the lives of 4 women who loved him dearly.
My dad made many poor choices in his life. Many that cost him his family and ultimately his life. Had he known June 20th would be his last day...would he have chosen differently? Only God knows.
I do have a memory of him at the altar with my mom. Did he truly surrender his life? That's between him and the Lord. I guess his life was so much more than my earthly heart can comprehend. Because of his choices....I weigh mine much more carefully. My poor kids know my feelings and fears. They can thank their grandad for the warnings of what making poor choices can lead too. I guess in some way he has left an influence on the legacy I will leave. Also, my husband can thank him for my constant encouragement to be a better father and leader in our home. My family may see this as nagging but I see this as a road I never want to repeat. I don't have many memories of the man I knew as daddy. I wish I did. But I have come to realize that the weakness that I knew in him has become a strength that I otherwise may have never obtained. Learning to count the cost in every thought and deed. I guess in some strange way what he has left does have some eternal value.

I guess Fathers Day is a bitter sweet time in my life. But it is also a reminder of the mercy and grace my real Father has shown our family for the last 33 years. He has truly been that father that my heart longs to know.

Surprise! Unexpected Harvest!

Let us not

Grow weary

while doing good

For in due season

We shall reap if we do not lose heart....

About 12 years ago, I sent off to the Arbor Day foundation for a  pack of seedlings to plant in our somewhat treeless yard. Every year since we have watched as those seedlings have slowly transformed into real trees. Several summers questioning if they would even survive this dry Georgia heat.
Our land consist of about 1 1/2 acres of grass. Cutting the yard takes a while. It's funny how you can be surrounded my something so beautiful but never really take the time to notice the details. Until today! You would think after our weekly trips around the yard we would have noticed. On occasion I even walk the tree line just to look at the health of the trees. It took my husband nearly being knocked in the head with the branch of what we thought was just a flowering tree to see this amazing treasure. It turned out the branch was loaded with apples! They weren't there last week. I thought this was a Washington Hawthorn, just a flowering tree that put off beautiful purple buds in the spring. This tree has taken 12 years to get to the size it is today and we have never seen a hint of an apple on it. Why today?

Had I known 12 years ago this tree might produce fruit...I probably would have given up dreaming of the day we might actually harvest something sweet and beautiful! Talking about never lose heart! 12 years to reap a harvest?! How many times have you prayed for someone or for God to do something in your life and just gave up hope because it was taking a very long time? Thinking He wasn't really listening?  God's seasons are different from what our Earthly minds can comprehend. He never gives up hope!  He's working on the details and our eyes are blinded to the beauty of the transformation that is taking place.

I listened to a story of a lady who had prayed for her sister for many years. A prayer for her to surrender her life to Jesus. For years and years this lady laid her request before the Father on her sister's behalf. Never giving up hope! Many years later this sister in her 80's said yes to call. Yes, to the prayer! We shall reap if we do not lose heart....

Galatians 5:22-23
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, ²³ gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.

I must confess I do lose heart at times. I'm not a very patient person. I really chuckle when someone says"You must be a patient woman to have so many children!" Ha! If they only knew! I too, wonder at times if God hears my cries! I am a worrier...not a good thing with so many children  under one roof.  But He's teaching me little by little to trust him. To NEVER give up hope. To NEVER grow weary. For in HIS season I will reap the very best harvest!  Even the unexpected ones!

So thankful for the reminders God gives to never lose hope! Maybe you too have prayed for someone for years....NEVER give up hope! Maybe you have prayed for a job....NEVER give up hope! Whatever it is you are praying for....God hears and He's working to ripen your request to perfection.

 Keep planting those seeds....you never know what you might get  might happen!

Psalm 1:1-3
Blessed is the man
Who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly,
Nor stands in the path of sinners,
Nor sits in the seat of the scornful;
² But his delight is in the law of the Lord,
And in His law he meditates day and night.
³ He shall be like a tree
Planted by the rivers of water,
That brings forth its fruit in its season,
Whose leaf also shall not wither;
And whatever he does shall prosper

Learning to let go....time to step aside

Remember this post...The Day She Fell ? This past weekend at the lake, our son...the one whom I have had the pleasure of escorting to the emergency room countless times over the years, fell as he was wakeboarding. Landing with his head sideways into the water. Thankfully I wasn't present on the boat at the time. The fear came as our daughter came running back up to the house saying her brother couldn't remember some bits of time. As I looked at him walking up to the house...he looked ok. But as he got closer, that mom in me knew and the fear became real. Flash backs from Mackenzie's accident clouded my mind as I let fear set in. His struggle and agitation with trying to remember was more than this mom's heart could take. Knowing he needed to make his yearly ER visit, I took the reins and told him he was going and to go change.  A mom never stops mothering just because her children are grown.What I wasn't prepared for was his agitation and voicing his opinion that everyone didn't need to go. Everyone wasn't going to start with. Just his dad and I.  I guess I just assumed that by being his mom I would automatically be included. I asked him who he wanted to go with him and he pointed to his fiance'. So at that point I knew it was time to let go. I just thought it would be after they got married. So with my broken and struggling heart I stepped aside. Left to entertain those left at the house to wait. Trying really hard to not let resentment become a stronghold in my heart. I know this wasn't about me. But for the first time, our history with the ER visits has ended and now I'm left waiting like everyone else. Left feeling like I'm just another bystander in my son's life.

The crazy thing is, our daughter was married a few years ago and this has never been an issue. I have always felt included. Why hadn't someone warned me of the feelings I would have with my sons?  After all they have never really dated a whole lot. Having a girl in his life is new to me. I was just getting use to all this.We have had a lot thrown at us in the last few months. Now I have to share and become second fiddle. I don't like it! I'm sure that all these feelings will change with time. I am happy for him. I just wasn't prepared with the initial shock of being forced to let go. Forced to step aside so soon. Again...why did I have to blink? I miss my little boys! It's so hard to think of them as grown men. Especially with them still under our roof.

The diagnosis was a ruptured eardrum and a concussion. We have a lot to be thankful for! His memory has returned and his ear is on the mend. Hopefully my heart won't sink the next time he slips his wakeboard onto his feet. I guess I wouldn't be his mama if  I didn't worry just a little as he tugs at my heartstrings.

Again...A mom's work is never done! Even if her children are grown and don't see it.

What's in a name?

Proverbs 22:1

New King James Version (NKJV)

22 A good name is to be chosen rather than great riches,
Loving favor rather than silver and gold

Tonight our daughter had the pleasure of experiencing this very thing. She found favor because of a good name...her dad's.  I'm not sure if this man realized that he was a part of a lesson God was conveying. But I sure hope she will remember this for the rest of her life. I know I will!

I have always told my kids to make sure that in all that they do to try and always remember that they represent our family. That they represent Jesus. Keep it clean. Always do the right thing and make good choices!

How do you represent your family? How do you represent your name? Your Faith ? Your Maker?

OK girls we all know gossip is a real problem for us girls...and men. Learning to bite our tongues isn't easy. Do you want to be known as a woman...or man who gossips? Gossip destroys relationships. Destroys a good name.

How about being prejudice? I grew up in a era where being prejudice was a way of life in our southern state. I must say...I am not proud of this fact. I feel it's very wrong to be prejudice towards someone just because of the color of their skin, the food they choose to eat, the hair style they choose to wear or the shoes on their feet. I could go on and on. Why would someone put themselves above another just because of that person's choices of material things or things that a person has no control over? Would you want your name to be associated with bigotry? What's in your name?

I am sad to say too often I have experienced this in my life. I have been on both ends....the giving and  the receiving. It never turns out good no matter how you slice it.  Where is our passion, our kindness? All those things God speaks of in 1st Corinthians 13 .   How do you want to be known?
Do you want to be known as someone who is prejudice, gossips....toots your own horn? Or do you want to be the person God speaks of who loves beyond what your eyes see? Beyond the flesh and bones standing before you. Too often we waste our time tearing people down when in reality we should be helping to build them up. When is the last time you reached out to that someone who is shunned by your community...your friends....your family?  Give with open hands never expecting anything or recognition in return. Yes, I struggle with this...it's called pride. We all know what happens with pride. Pride comes before the fall! Proverbs 16.

Is your good name associated with wealth and things? Or is it associated by the passion in your heart to live as a man or woman of  noble character?

Your name. Your Family's name. What's in it? It's never too late to turn things around. It just starts with a willing heart and a whole lot of humility!

 

Fly Baby Fly....

Where has the time gone? Here I sit in amazement at how quickly our children have grown.On Sunday I was listening to our older kids talk about how long they have been out of high school....Our oldest kids have been out for 6, 7 and 8 years. Yes, I had 3 back to back graduates! Yes, it broke us! We're still recouping. Man...why did I have to blink?

Tomorrow marks another milestone in our family. Number 5 is about to fly! Tomorrow night marks 5 Jackson County graduates from our family alone. Can I breathe yet? I have 4 more to go!

Jessica...you are one special girl woman. You make us so proud! I can't believe that little bundle we brought home on Christmas Eve is about to begin REAL life! Your passion for Jesus is why your smile is so beautiful. Your eyes light up everytime you flash those pearly whites. Every time you speak His name. God has brought you on this journey to accomplish His plan that He ordained since your very beginning. All your struggles and all your successes have brought you to where you are today. Now it's time to wipe the slate clean and begin a new journey. A new life. A new chapter. I love you more than I can say. Watching you grow to love your maker has been my greatest desire. Your willingness to be used by Him has made a difference in many lives. Hold on to Him....in the good times and in the bad.  Keep your eyes on Him and He will bring you more peace and wisdom than you can ever imagine. Jessica your life matters! So hang on to that love and passion.... you are about to fly!

I love you,
Mom

The greatest woman I know....

I met her the day she turned 18...We share a birthday, we shared a last name for a short while, we share a love for our Heavenly Father who loves us more than words can express! This woman has taught me so much about life and how to be the very best mom I can be! Her wisdom is where I run to when I have no answers.  But the greatest gift she ever gave me... was to show me how to live for Christ! I am so proud to say ....This is my mom and I love her! I hope I can be just like her when I grow up!


Love you Mom! You're my hero!

New friends!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks to Kelly's Korner I have new friends!  What a great idea she had. The best part was to encourage us to search the list for the blog friends in our own areas that had joined her link up.

As a busy mom of 9 my "free time" is few and far between. However, out of my desire to have some sort of record of the Holcombe craziness for my children to reminisce with someday...I try and blog when I can steal a few moments! As you could tell from last week in this post . Life is just...you would had to have been there!  I do love being a mama. I do love being a wife! Blogging helps me to find that I 'm not alone in the journey of being a stay at home mom!  I look forward to hearing from any who dare begin to join us on our journey. I hope I can bring you a little laughter (laughter is good for the soul) and encouragement as you walk your own journey of life. Please feel free to ask any questions or offer advise. I too need encouragement!

Thank you Kelly for being a willing vessel in sharing your blog friends with us!