From the early age of thirteen, I learned that life can turn on a dime. In a second you can be facing the wind of death and feeling like the wind has been sucked right out of your lungs. Learning that in the face of fear, crying out to Jesus can bring a peace that none could explain or duplicate. Life is fragile, but when placed in the hands of a saviour walking the journey will be hard but never lonely or hopeless.
I have tried to teach my children, when faced with a fear all they need to do is cry out to Jesus. Raising nine kids, I have seen my share of fears. Many times the first and only words out of my mouth "Jesus!" This weekend has been no exception!
Our journey began with a shopping trip to get last minute things for a wedding we would be attending and give my husband some quiet for a conference call he had while working from home. I am thankful he was home and not out of town or over an hour away! God does order our steps. Choosing to follow Him and allowing Him to lead, trusting Him with the unseen road ahead can be a battle in itself.
Shopping with girls at times can be moments of craziness...trying my best to give each one my undivided attention. Not to mention keeping up with a very independent fearless little four year old. At this point all the would of,should of,could of thoughts race through my mind. Hind sight is always twenty-twenty! Our girls were behaving really good and I was relaxed enough to just browse the store with them a few steps ahead of me. Normally Mackenzie hates the buggy. I battle just to get her to ride. Not this day! She jumped in the moment we entered the store. Oh and how many times have I heard myself say "Sit down!" or " Don't stand in the buggy!" ? No amount of seat belts or straps with locks would keep her in anyway. She's a little Houdini! Usually she just gets in and out of the buggy. At some point as we entered the house wares department and I turned my back...this is where my whole world stopped and my cries to Jesus began! Have you ever heard a huge thump coming from the direction your children may be in? As I turned in the direction of that "thump" I'm thinking the buggy has turned over. All I see is the buggy upright and my daughter picking up Mackenzie from the floor. She had been standing up in this stroller like cart and fell backwards out onto the hard carpeted floor. I see her somewhat limp body and realize she needs to stay on the floor. She's silent and as I look into her eyes my heart becomes sick of the reality of the moment. I have seen my share of dying family members and pets. I know the look! I cry "Oh Jesus please!" From my training I know I need to get her talking, talking to her and questions to her are flying right along with my prayers to the almighty Father!
It's twelve- fifteen pm on a Friday...not a soul in the area we were in, way in the back of the store. Grabbing my phone I dial 911. With our two daughters watching their sister and I on the floor begging for help....still not a soul hears or comes our way. Except, our heavenly Father is right there! I'm NEVER alone! I question my girls later and yes...there was others who looked in our direction. Others...Customers and Employees of this store. As I'm on the phone with 911 Mackenzie begins to cry. "Crying is good!" says the help on the other end. But your not seeing what I'm seeing and the doubts flood my faith, or whats left of it. He's there...my comfort,my peace and yes...my joy! I hang up and wait . I call my husband to come and then post a cry for prayer via Facebook. I am amazed at how quickly a prayer request can spread via this social network. Ten minutes on the floor...Kenzie's crying and I'm thinking can somebody get here please! I know they are less than a half mile down the road. I call back! "Please, where are they?" Their on their way is my only comfort.. And I wait. Sending my oldest daughter to the front of the store to watch for the EMTs. Finally here comes the
calvary help! Right along with a woman and a clip board... Should I punch her at this point?! Can we say....She was trying to cover the store's behind?
I am not an advocate for suing and do not intend to at this point. I am amazed at how many people have asked us if we are going to sue. This accident has made me realize we have become a society of people who are afraid to step forward and help someone when they see they are in need of assistance. We are a sue happy society! I am ashamed that I live in a country with people who are so self-centered that they wouldn't even step forward to help an injured small child. Why someone would have been afraid to step forward and help me I'll never know. Why would they allow my daughters to see their cold hearts? That makes my blood boil!
EMTs arrive and Mackenzie sits up on her own to get close to me. Her head appearing to be heavy and eyes still not looking like she's all there. She is at this point answering some of the questions they ask her. Waiting on my husband to arrive and deciding which Hospital to go to...I call my sister for help on that one... we load her on the back board with a neck brace. My sister helped us to decide which hospital and was meeting us there. She'll never know how much she blesses me! In all my years of mothering 9 kids this is the first time I have ever had to ride in an ambulance! My husband arrives much to the relief of myself and my daughter...she's been crying for her daddy the whole time! I love that man!
Now the decision is, I'll ride with Mackenzie and my husband will take the other two home to stay with the older siblings. As I'm walking out the door with Mackenzie....that woman with the clip board...she approaches me for information. The one word I have such a difficult time saying...I didn't have a problem then. Hadn't she been cold enough? I should have punched her the first time! Some people don't think. A mom who's daughter is being taken via ambulance because of a serious head injury and your stopping her for information to cover your store's butt...not cool! Here is where I realize what an awesome God I serve. Our oldest son just happened to be in the store at the same time and he calls me as we are loading Mackenzie in the ambulance. " Mom...what color shirt?"...I stop him mid sentence..."I'm here. We're taking Mackenzie in an ambulance! I need you to take the girls with you!" Poor guy I didn't give him time to answer. God placed him right there at the right time and prompted him to call me just at the last minute when I needed him! Do you believe that God orders our steps when we believe and trust Him?
Our ride to Egleston consisted of me trying to keep her awake and convince her we were almost there. As they loaded her in the ambulance she informs us she needs to potty and is hungry.Do you know that kid held it all the way there?! We arrived to ER and promptly seen. X-Rays were taken,waiting on results. Results come back and show no trauma. Protocol is no CT scans unless other symptoms of a concussion are visible. All she had was the loss of consciousness in the store. However...she still wasn't acting herself. I really didn't want to go home and have to come back. We choose a CT head scan and we wait. On the way back from the CT scan Mackenzie became more alert and acting herself. This was several hours after the injury. While waiting on the results Mackenzie starts showing symptoms of her head injury...right on the floor! We made the right choice! Soon a neurosurgeon comes in and explains Mackenzie has a break in her skull. Had it been just a hair closer to the right it could have been really bad. Her break was a straight clean break,right through her skull. No signs of blood or injury to the brain. Prayer works! My God is worthy to be praised!
Because of her age an overnight stay is ordered...Hotel Egleston and the 5th floor. I must say the nursing staff was wonderful. We settled in, my sister and I go down stairs to eat while Mackenzie has some daddy time. While away she has more of the same symptoms. Poor baby now needs a bath and bed change. I really hate this. Here comes the mommy guilt. All beyond my control and looking to God for answers. IV fluids are given and the reality of all that's happened sets in. It's really a hard thing to see a small child laying in a hospital bed. Looking up and down the halls...I count my blessings.
Night falls,visit from big brother and snuggling time with my baby girl until she falls asleep. My hubby had left earlier to retrieve my van from the store parking lot. Now my sister leaves and here I am alone...not really...to sleep on that nice comfy couch bed. Sleep is not happening. Very long night.Waiting for the morning and my hubby.
Morning brings another episode of last night's snack. New doctor's orders...one more night if she can't keep food down. We try crackers again and she inhales five small packs (two in each pack) of saltines. So far so good! Two-thirty we order her a full tray...Grilled cheese, chicken noodle soup, fries and a cinnamon roll! Thirty minutes later she is feasting and burping from the ginger ale. Not so funny after her two episodes the day before. It looks like she may be on the mend! The nourishment brings life back to this little girl and what a lively little thing she is.
We missed that wedding. All I heard from Mackenzie the whole time in the ER is..." I want to go to Julie's wedding!" Sorry Julie and Nathan! With her crying and disappointment I promised her we would catch the next one. Anyone getting married soon?
We did get to leave Hotel Egleston thirty-three hours after Mackenzie's head trauma. Only God knows how close we came to losing our little girl. I pray I never know! Now to find a padded room for a couple of weeks. For her...Not me! Watch the video and you will see why! Just mute the music at the bottom of this page.
